Dialectic and Behavioral Therapies

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Baffled by Brains and
Our Own Behavior

The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.
– William James

One of the things that therapists have seen for over a century is a strong connection between what people think and how content they are. When we are able to develop a good flow of thoughts, we often feel happier and calmer in our bodies. When our behaviors serve our greater good, rather than working against us, we’re joyful.

Our life is what our thoughts make it.
– Marcus Aurelius Antoninus

Therapies that focus on the mind and changing certain thought patterns and behavior patterns can bring relief for some kinds of suffering. Don’t we all enjoy hearing ourselves say internally, “I did a good job!” rather than “I’m awful at this and a terrible failure”? Changing certain thinking patterns can indeed make us happier and healthier. We struggle to make change alone. A partner can help.

Our minds are all we have. They are all we have ever had. And they are all we can offer others… Every experience you have ever had has been shaped by your mind. Every relationship is as good or as bad as it is because of the minds involved.
– Sam Harris

Sometimes, it is our habits or actions that have trapped us in unhealthy places. We procrastinate, fail to exercise, or shout at the kids. Sometimes our behavior might be even more destructive. Perhaps we gamble, cut our skin, purge, or have gained a lot of weight. We want to change our behaviors but never quite succeed. Sometimes we just put up with poor health and pain-filled bodies.

Whatever you would make habitual, practice it; and if you would not make a thing habitual, do not practice it, but accustom yourself to something else.
– Epictetus

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) are types of treatment that can be supportive if you already know you want to change some aspect of your behavior. They focus on specific problems and established goals to change undesirable behaviors and thoughts. If you are plagued with troublesome thoughts or habits, I will use CBT techniques to bring about lasting change in how those thoughts arise and to replace them with empowering ones that can manifest in behavioral changes. Employing DBT, I may engage you in in role plays, creating mantras, journaling, exercises, and discussion about the circumstances that lead to self-defeating thoughts, and we will share insights about challenges for the future.

Dr Bessel van der Kolk, summarizing extensive research, states that “Cognitive behavioral therapies and mindfulness-based practices have been shown to have a positive impact on pain, joint inflammation, physical disability, and depression” and some studies show even an improved immune system.

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The Brain--is wider than the Sky-- For --put them side by side-- The one the other will contain With ease--and You--beside. - Emily Dickinson
The Brain–is wider than the Sky–
For –put them side by side–
The one the other will contain
With ease–and You–beside.
– Emily Dickinson

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson

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We first make our habits, and then our habits make us. - John Dryden
We first make our habits, and then our habits make us.
– John Dryden

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Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. - Viktor Frankl
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.
– Viktor Frankl

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The greatest revolution of our generation is the discovery that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives. - William James
The greatest revolution of our generation is the discovery that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.
– William James

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